I thought we were going to Kevin's house.
We are, sweetie. This is Kevin's new house.
Wow.
(Larry ) Amazing house! (Bob ) Not bad, huh?
Maybe he uses marijuana for medicinal purposes. People do.
Look, he's been lying from the start.
Hey. Getting some quality time with the boys?
Yeah. It was fun.
Listen, I hope this lunch isn't too weird for you.
Why would "BBQ at Best Man's" be weird?
Oh, my God, Greg! I was sure I told you.
Kevin is Bob's best man. This is his place.
Kevin, your ex-fiancé?
(All cheering and greeting)
How does he know Bob?
(Both grunting)
Well, they...went to Lacrosse Camp together,
and Kevin was the one who introduced Bob to Debbie.
Lacrosse Camp?
(Kevin ) I was able to salvage this wood from an old chapel in Nantucket.
(All) Wow!
(Pam ) The house is amazing. (Kevin ) Thank you.
OK, the sun is out, the grill is hot and the pool is luke,
so if I can interest you in a swim and a BBQ, just follow me.
All right, Kevo. Right on schedule.
- Bring it on! - Must've cost a fortune.
(Chatter continues )
- You OK, sweetie? - Yeah.
I'm really sorry. I thought you knew.
It's not a big deal.
If I can handle a weekend without sex and cigarettes,
I can handle your ex-fiancé.
OK, thank you.
For the floor you're walking on, I chose Bolivian wormwood.
It works well in here.
I have the Viking range and the twin Sub-Zs. They open up right there.
Oh, I get it. Like, hidden.
- Yeah, kinda blend in. - Great.
Are you a homeowner, Greg?
No, no. I rent.
Oh.
So, things are going real well for you, aren't they, Kevo?
Things have been going so great lately.
I got in early on some wireless IPOs and the stuff just skyrocketed.
Wow.
Greg, what line of work are you in?
I'm in healthcare.
So you know what I mean. There's lots to be made with the biotech stuff.
I don't have to tell you that.
How's your portfolio?
I'd say strong...
to quite strong.
Yeah, strike while the iron's hot. Now's the time.
Greg's a male nurse.
That's right. Thank you, Jack.
Wow. That's great, to give something back like that.
I'd love to do some volunteer work.
The other day, I saw this dog, he had, like, a gimp, he couldn't...
It made me feel terrible. I wished I could do something.
Well, I get paid, but also it feels, you know, good,
so it's kind of, everybody wins.
What do you...? You're a Wall Street trader, an investment guy?
I don't like to be painted with that brush. Yes, that's my job...
Do we have time? OK, I wanna show you what I'm really interested in.
Come on, let's go.
Wow! Looks like somebody got an "A" in wood shop.
Yeah, it's always been kind of a hobby.
I whittled that out of beechwood.
It's beautiful. So, what got you into carpentering?
Carpentry? I guess I'd have to say Jesus.
He was a carpenter and I figured
if you're gonna follow in someone's footsteps, who better than Christ?
Hm.
Greg's Jewish.
- Are you? - Yeah.
Mm-hm.
Well, so was JC! Wow. You're in good company.
Ha! Right.
I'm gonna head to the pool,
but why don't you show Greg and Pam the gift?
(Greg) You made a gift? (Pam ) Greg.
I just put a fresh coat of lacquer on this, so bear with me with the fumes.
Wow! Kev!
- Isn't that something? - That's incredible!
Roses. Deb's favorite!
- Yes, right. - The little holes are for candles?
Yes. Later, they'll collect rainfall and make a tiny birdbath.
That's great.
It's beautiful. What is it?
It's an altar. Or you might call it a chuppah?
Isn't that sweet? Wow.
I'll take it to the Byrnes' and tomorrow Robert and Deborah
will meet beneath it to become man and wife.
And later, when they purchase a home, maybe it'll grace their garden.
Well, that's my... sappy, romantic idea.
It must have taken forever to build.
Not too bad. About 70 hours, which isn't bad,
considering I carved it by hand from one piece of wood.
(Jack) 'Hey, Kevo! 12:15. Time to start the barbecue.'
OK, Mr. B. I better get back to playing host.
You guys grab your suits and I'll meet you at the pool.
I'm gonna pass on the swimming.
You can't!
I don't even have a suit.
(Jack) 'Pamcake, Pop's got your suit out here.'
- Coming, Dad. - You gotta get going.
Gosh, she's great. Congratulations.
Thank you. And by the way, she had the nicest things to say about you.
Really?
- Yeah. - Hm.
Gosh, yeah, we had some good times together.
Whoo, she is a tomcat!
Whew! So, let me hook you up with some trunks, Gregor.
- I'm not gonna swim... - I'm not taking no for an answer.
(Kevin ) Cold buffet's on the left, wine and champagne on the right.
Yeah, that'd be grea...
Hey, there he is! Get out here.
(Wolf whistle )
G-man, we got salmon, we got swordfish. What'll it be?
Uh...how about a little of both...
K-dog... I'm pretty hungry.
I think they call that the munchies.
(Bob ) Let's go. Come on, Kev. Serve it up!
Damn!
Come on, team. He's got nothing!
Service!
- Nice serve, pal. - All right!
Whoa, yes!
Get it!
Come on!
- Nice shot, Maverick! - Sweet setup, Iceman!
(Larry ) Nice one, Nurse!
- Glen, don't be afraid of the ball. - It's Greg.
Huddle up, team.
Not Glen. Greg is afraid of the ball.
This is unacceptable!
Here's what we gotta do.
- (Kevin ) Let's go! - We're getting creamed.
If Florence Nightingale played some defense...
- Larry, I missed one shot. - It was a big shot!
Larry, keep floating. Denny, go deep.
Greg, nobody's expecting much from you
so if I set you up can you spike it?
Yeah, I'd have to be pretty high.
- I bet you would, Panama Red. - (Larry sniggers )
- All right, look sharp. - Let's play ball!
Come on!
Let's go! Come on!
You got to spike those, Focker! You got to spike.
Look how Bob did it.
Thanks.
Fire it up, Focker!
- Let's do it! Good shot! - Way to go, Deb!
Greg!
(Roaring in slow motion )
- What's the matter with you? - It's only a game!
(Debbie wailing)
My eye! Oh, my eye!
- (Jack) Pam, help your sister. - I'm sorry, Deb.
You can see "Voight" backwards on your forehead.
Denny!
You the bandleader? Go over song selection with Bob. Bob!
- Are you a Mr. Focker? - Yes.
- OK, sign here, please. - Thank you.
Hey, your suitcase. You made sure it's all there?
Yeah, it's fine. What's up?
Just want to make sure you're OK since hitting that spike.
- I'm really sorry about that. - That's OK.
I don't know what got into me, Iceman.
- Iceman? - Sorry, is it special for you two?
- No, Greg. Stop it. - Stop what, Iceman?
Top Gun was a very popular movie when we dated. That's it.
Hey, Iceman, I have no problem with that.
Do you wanna be Maverick? Is that what this is about?
I can't be, Kevin's Maverick.
No, he used to be, but we can change that.
Can he be Goose?
No, because Goose dies in the end.
It's very sad.
- Honey, I don't... - Greg, shut up.
OK.
Dad! You ever think of knocking?
Not in my own den. What are you two doing?
I'd say rounding second base.
This is Greg's room, Dad.
Not now - it's storage. Greg's in Deb's room and she'll bunk with you.
- Fine. Come on, Greg. - I'll be right up.
Meet you upstairs.
- Oh, good. They found your suitcase. - Yeah.
I don't know what happened at the tux shop
but if I gave you the wrong impression
regarding Pam in any way, I'm sorry, OK?
I have the best intentions with Pam.
Actually, there's something in my suitcase
that I plan to give her that I think, um,
symbolizes...
(Banging)
..the level of my commitment to her.
And I wouldn't feel right asking her to wear it
without her father's permission... Jack?
Did you flush this toilet?
Maybe... You know what? Maybe Jinx flushed it.
I saw Jinxy come in last night and squat and relieve himself.
Jinx knows not to use that toilet. If he did, he'd never flush it.
What does it matter?
The matter, Greg RN, is when this toilet is flushed, it runs.
With a near-full septic tank and toilet running all night,
you could have a problem.
Mr. Byrnes?
(Man ) This is not part of my job description.
Nice stench. Really on a roll there, bud.
Bite me, Denny.
In 20 hours there's a wedding here, so I need my cesspool pumped now.
Not tomorrow, now!
Dad, what's going on? Oh, my God.
That smell, Bob, is our shit.
Focker made the septic tank overflow.
Jack, I told you it wasn't me. It was Jinx.
Focker, I'm not gonna tell you again! Jinx cannot flush the toilet!
He's a cat, for Christ's sakes!
He doesn't have thumbs, Focker!
- Hey, look at this! - Kevo!
Over by the tree, right?
No, no, not on the lawn. Stay where you are!
- Not on the lawn! - Kevin!
No, no!
(All) No!
- Oh! - No, no!
What the heck?
# I got my mojo working
# Just won't work on you
# I got my mojo working
# Just won't work on you... #
Oh, no!
That's what I said I wanted cos it is a black Samsonite suitcase.
But do you think that it's possible that Samsonite,
in some crazy scheme to turn a profit, made more than one?
- 'I don't think so, sir.' - Really, you don't? Hey!
Jinxy, stop.
I know I signed for it... Don't tell me... What?
Do me a favor. Can I talk to your supervisor?
- Hmm? What's your name? - 'Joy.'
- Get me your supervisor. - 'He's on a break.'
When he gets back, have him give me a call, OK?
It's a very important bag.
(Meow )
Jinx!
Don't ask me what for, I just need you to do this thing.
I'm in a time situation so just do it.
- 'OK. Greg Focker?' - Greg or Gregory. Run both names.
Psst! Jinx! Psst, psst!
Come on! No! Jinx, come here! Jinxy!
Mew, mew, mew.
No! No! Jinx! Shit!
Greg didn't ace his med school Boards. He never even took the MCATs.
Oh, Jack, that's what you had your sources check out?
What this poor boy did on some test scores?
I bet he doesn't have a real nursing degree.
A lot of these hospital workers are pill poppers looking for 'ludes.
We know he's been puffing the magic dragon.
I knew the little cracker was lying.
Jinxy! Come here.
Come here, little Jinxy.
Oh.
(Meow )
# Jinxy cat, Jinxy cat
# I won't hurt you #
The fact is, Greg lied to you.
He did not lie to me, Dad!
You should know the truth. I love you too much to see you get hurt.
I don't care what your information says,
Greg took the MCATs, OK?
(Phone )
- (Man speaking Thai) - (Speaking Thai)
(Meow )
- (Meow ) - Oh!
- (Meow ) - Shit!
Whoa!
No! No!
No!
Oh!
Oh, my God!
All right, all right, stand back!
Stay back. Call 911.
(Pam ) Jinxy. Jinxy!
We checked every yard, nobody's seen him.
He's not up in the trees.
- Jinx isn't up here. - The neighbors haven't seen him.
You tried to milk him, you sick son of a bitch!
Dad, stop it! That's enough!
Please calm down.
How? 15 minutes to go and the ring bearer's missing.
- The ring bearer? - Your daddy didn't tell you?
He taught Jinx to walk down the aisle with this little pillow.
Oh, no, no, you didn't, Dad.
Yeah, you put this around the neck and the ribbons are for the rings.
Oh, for Christ's sakes!
- Oh, Dad. - Now we can't have the rehearsal.
Bob, you ride with me. Larry, come with your car.
If we're not back in an hour, we'll reschedule for the morning.
No! We cannot cancel the rehearsal for some stupid cat.
How could you say that? That cat's been like a brother to you!
We just let him wander the streets without food, water or toilet?
- Dad, Greg'll find him. - What?
Yeah, what?
That's wonderful.
Fine. Fine. OK. Denny?
Denny? Denny!
Dad, I'm here.
Oh, OK. You'll be the ring bearer for now.
I'm not wearing that stupid pillow on my head.
Oh, yes, you damn well will!
Jinx!
Jinx! Come on, Jinx.
"Let him wander the streets without food, water or toilet...
"Focker"!
Actually, you may be in luck.
They brought in a Himalayan a little while ago.
There he is.
Holy shit! That's Jinx!
- Jinxy... - Uh, let me see that photo again.
Picture him without the stupid cap.
Jinxy! Jinxy!
Uh, no.
You see, in the picture your cat has an all black tail,
and this one has a white tip.
No, I'm sorry about that, chief.
Looks just like him.
Almost. Except for that tail.
(Chainsaw whining)
- Dearly beloved... - (Crash)
Dearly beloved!
We are gathered here today to join Dr. Robert Banks...
(Whining and crashing)
Dearly beloved!
We are gathered here on this beautiful day to join...
(Meowing)
..in holy matrimony.
This is a special day...
He found him!
It's him!
Oh, Daddy, it's Jinx!
My little baby!
We found you! We found you!
(Pam ) This is great!
- (Bob ) Way to go, Greg! - Gave us a little scare, huh?
Jinxy! Aww...
# Ohh
# Oh, for once in my life
# I got someone who needs me... #
To Greg!
(All) To Greg!
- (Dina ) Where is Greg? - In the rest room.
Yes, I've tried every shelter in the north shore.
He's a brown and black Himalayan with an all black tail.
Mr. Jinx.
Yeah, you check. I'll call back.
(Laughter)
- Hey, it's the man of the hour. - Hey-hey!
Sorry, folks. Had to pay a visit to the urinal fairy.
Greg, nice work with the cat today.
Thanks, Jack. Glad I could help.
Hey, we never did finish that little convo in the den.
So there is still something I'd like to talk about.
We'll get right to it as soon as we get back.
I'm gonna hold you to that. Circle of Trust.
Guess who's back in the Circle of Trust?
(Paper tearing)
(Chewing)
(Meowing)
Whoo!
Oh, poor Kevin looks lonely.
I should ask him to dance. What do you think?
Sure. He could, uh, whittle a private dance floor for you two.
I'm serious. I saw some beechwood outside.
He's very handy. He's an extremely handy...
and crafty craftsman.
I shouldn't say that, but...
Come on, seriously. Part of you wishes you ended up with him.
Yes, he's very talented.
But it would have never worked out.
Why not?
I was never in love with Kevin.
I'm in love with you.
- That's a good explanation. - Think so?
- Thought you'd like that. - I do.
I'm glad.
No, Jinx. Mr. Jinx. I called you half an hour ago.
OK, I already... I already described it.
Airline.
Uh, it's, um...
It's...brown...
With a little bit of black...trim.
Yes.
'Please enter your four-digit code.'
(Entering numbers )
'Jack, it's Hank from next door.
'Guess who wandered over here today?
'Mr. Jinx. He's not wearing his collar, but it's Jinxy.
'So just give me a jingle when you guys get home,
'and I'll bring the rascal over.'
OK, just, uh, keep checking, please, and I'll call back. Thanks.
- Any luck? - No, they're still looking.
Jack, this is a great party.
Sometimes things just come together in their own...kookie sort of way.
Yeah. Like the way you found Jinxy at that animal shelter, huh?
Yeah-huh. Right.
- Well, he's home now. - Yes.
You know, something about that ball of fur
just puts a big smile on my face.
- Mm. - Yeah.
You haven't seen his new tricks?
No. Mm-mm.
- Well, I'll show you. - We don't have to do it tonight.
- He's probably tired. - No, he'd like to show you tonight.
(Linda ) Honey, I'll drive.
- Hey, Larry, why don't I drive? - Good idea!
I've always wanted to test-drive a Benz.
Be my guest, Focker.
- Sweetie, what are you doing? - Larry said I could drive.
Oh.
- Let's go. Hurry, hurry. - Bye, guys.
- (Linda ) Thanks for driving, Greg. - (Tires squealing)
- Drives better than a Taurus, huh? - Yeah.
- Get in the car, honey. Hurry up. - OK, OK.
- (Tires squealing) - (Dina ) Whoa, Nelly!
(Larry ) Everybody comfortable?
(Tires screeching)
You're a little wild man at that wheel!
That's a ride, man!
Got your seat belts on back there?
Oh, Jesus, Focker!
- Jeez, take it easy! - Benz drives like a dream.
Don't make it a nightmare.
Oh, there's Jack.
Hey, Jackie.
(Revving engine )
You wanna play, pops? Let's play.
(Revving engine )
(Linda ) OK, now, Greg... Greg?
(Tires screech)
Is everything OK, honey?
Yeah, just trying to make good time.
What is the matter with you?
All right, we're gonna get home, very soon.
(Women screaming)
Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
It's not the autobahn!
(Brakes screech)
(Linda ) Maybe you should drive, honey.
Oh, no. Oh, no, please.
- Yes! - Jack just turned.
You were supposed to make that left at the light...Focker.
(Linda ) I'm gonna be sick.
(Denny ) Where is he going?
(Bob ) Home, home, home.
(Linda ) What a ride.
(Denny ) Who gave him the keys? OK, we're out.
(Larry ) Does he have a license? (Denny ) Yeah, a license to kill.
(Bob ) Hey, nice driving, Mario!
Lunatic. You're a lunatic!
(Pam ) Aw, leave him alone.
(Debbie screams )
(All talking)
- It's everything! - The cat!
God damn you, Jinx! I'll get you...!
Dad! Hey, hey! Dad! Calm down!
Where's the cat?!
- (Larry ) Cat got out! Cat got out! - All right...
You spray-painted his tail to make him look like Jinxy, didn't you?
What's he talking about?
Hank Macatee called me and told me he found Jinxy.
He put his collar on an impostor, then spray-painted his tail,
then he tried to beat us back to get rid of the evidence!
Oh, no, he...
Please tell me that's not true, Greg.
It was just a temporary solution until I could find the real Jinx.
How could you do something like that?
I'm sorry.
What are you gonna say next - that you set Kevin's altar on fire?
Oh, my God!
Well, it wasn't intentional. I was...chasing Jinx...
I had a smoke, and I think I lit something...
I don't know. He put so much... goddam lacquer on that thing.
It was an accident waiting to happen!
This is very disappointing, Greg.
Get out of my house, Focker, and take your friend with you.
So you lied about everything? The cat, the fire...
- The MCATs... - I didn't lie about the MCATs.
Pam, don't you see? Your dad has turned you against me!
I didn't turn her against you. You did that.
Jack, you didn't like me from the second I walked in here!
I'm a very accepting person, Focker. All I ask for is honesty.
You want honesty?
You wanna talk about truth and honesty?
OK, let's talk a little operation...
Ko Samui...
- Jack. - What's he talking about, Dad?
I thought there weren't any secrets inside the Circle of Trust.
- I don't know what you mean. - You don't, huh?
Cat got your tongue?
Pam, Daddy's planning a covert operation in Thailand
for the day after the wedding.
You are?
Round and round we go, Jack.
They'd love to hear about your rendezvous in the parking lot.
You know, where the guy gave you the passports and documents?
Or your little phone call in Thai?
(Scoffs ) Jack can't talk Thai.
Oh, no, Dina, Jack can talk Thai. Jack talks Thai very well.
I'm sorry, Pam, but your dad is not retired.
He's still very much in the CIA.
Daddy?
He...he's right. He's right. I...I... My...my cover's blown.
I...I am planning a secret operation the day after the wedding.
What?
A surprise honeymoon for Deb and Bob.
You stupid son of a bitch! You just blew it!
What?
Ko Samui's an island off the coast of Thailand!
That guy in the parking lot is my travel agent!
He was giving me their visas!
Wow, Thailand. Thanks a lot, JB. That's some...
Don't mention it. I just...
You know, if nursing doesn't work out, you have a career in espionage.
(Sniggers )
Thanks, Greg.
Well, I guess I'm gonna go to the airport now.
I guess you're gonna stay here?
Pam, I...
It's OK. It's OK.
Gaylord M. Focker?
"Gaylord"?
Yeah, that's me.
- I thought your name was Greg. - It is.
- That's not on the form. - No one's called me by it
since I was in third grade.
(Sniggering)
(Courier) Whatever.
Wait, wait, wait. Your name's Gay Focker?
(Laughter)
- Denny. - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
It's not a normal name, you know?
You're in luck. There is room...
(Typing)
And without a Saturday stay-over that fare difference will be
$1,137 and 11 cents.
- Did you want me to book this seat? - OK. All right.
- (Typing) - Did you want to check any bags?
We should be all right with only one usher.
I'm not so sure, Jack.
Thought you might like to see this.
- How did you get this? - I have my sources, too.
I called Gaylord - AKA Greg's parents in Detroit.
They saved his SAT scores, too, in case you're interested.
Oh, honey, it doesn't matter if he did well in some test.
Look at this! He almost destroyed the wedding because he lied!
I love you, Daddy...
but you can be a real jerk sometimes.
So what if he took the MCATs? He's still not good enough for Pam.
Who is, Jack?
Nobody has ever been good enough for your Pam.
I mean, do you realize that you never even warmed up to Kevin
until she broke up with him?
Maybe it's time you think about what Pam wants.
Greg, it's me.
I'm sure you're in the air by now,
so, um, I guess you'll get this when you get home.
Um...
Listen, I am so sorry.
I acted like a complete idiot, and...
And I hope that you can forgive me.
I mean, I...I don't care about...
the fire or the cat or...
I mean, I can't believe you actually...spray-painted a cat...
It's actually really gross.
But the point is that...
that I understand why you did it, and...
and I love you.
I want you to know that I really, I really, really love you and...
So when you get this, will you please call me?
OK, bye.
I need a commercial flight ID scan. New York, La Guardia to Chicago.
Four-hour sweeps,
last name Foxtrot-Oscar- Charlie-Kilo-Echo-Romeo,
first name Golf-Alpha-Yankee...
'Gaylord Focker, Atlantic American flight 27. Departs 2:35.'
- 2:35? - 'Affirmative.'
23 minutes. Thanks.
(Clerk) Enjoy your flight.
Hello.
Sorry, we're only boarding rows nine and above. You'll have to wait.
I'm in row eight.
Please step aside, sir.
It's one row. Is it OK if I...?
We'll call your row momentarily.
Step aside, sir.
Hm.
(Through PA) Thank you for waiting.
We're now boarding all rows, please. All remaining rows.
Oh. Hello.
Mm-hm. Enjoy your flight.
(Horns honking)
Excuse me.
OK, where's the fire, huh?
- Sir, you'll have to check that. - I got it.
- No, sorry, that bag won't fit. - I'm not checking my bag.
Don't raise your voice, sir.
I'm not raising my voice. This would be raising my voice!
I don't wanna check my bag.
And your airline, you suck at checking bags.
I did that once and you lost it, and everything screwed up for me.
I assure you your bag will be placed safely below with the other luggage.
Oh, yeah? How do you know my bag is safe below?
Are you gonna take my bag and put it there?
Are you gonna go with the guys with the earmuffs and put it there?
- No. - OK, then shut your pie hole
and listen to me when I say
that I am finished with the checking-of-the-bags conversation!
Sir, if a bag is this large...
OK, you know what? Get your grubby little paws off of my bag!
It's not like I have a bomb to blow up the plane.
I just want to stow my bag according to regulations!
Sir! Sir!
If you would take the sticks out of your head you would see
that all I have to do is do what I wanna do,
and all I wanna do is hold on to my bag and not listen to you.
The only way I would let go
would be if you tried to pry it from my dead, lifeless fingers, OK?
If you can get it from my kung-fu grip, then you can have it.
Otherwise, step off, bitch!
(Gasps )
Get off of me! Get off of me!
Keep your... Agh!
Hey! You can't leave your vehicle unattended!
So tow it.
You threatened that stewardess.
I was just trying to get my bag into the overhead storage thing!
- You threatened her with a bomb! - I said I didn't have a bomb!
- You said bomb. - I said I didn't have a bomb.
- You said bomb on an airplane - What's wrong with that?
You can't say "bomb" on airplanes.
Bomb, bomb, bomb. Bomb, bomb, bomb-bomb.
Bomb bo-bo-bomb bo-bom-bom-bo-bomb!!
- Arrest me! - Assaulting an...
What if I was a bombardier?
Norm.
Take five. We got a specialist.
Bye, Norm.
Oh, shit. How'd you get here?
I'm everywhere, Focker.
- I didn't do anything, Jack. - Yeah, I know.
Then tell these guys that I'm not a terrorist.
I'm not telling anyone anything until you answer some questions.
Unless you wanna go to prison, you better tell me the truth.
No more lies, understand? No more lies.
- Did you do this? - Answer the question.
- Did you get me taken off the plane? - Put your hands over there.
You're sick, you know that?
Is your name Gaylord Focker? Yes or no.
Yes.
- Are you a male nurse? - Yes.
- Are you a pot head? - No.
- Have you ever smoked pot? - Yes.
Did you spray-paint the tail of a cat to pass him off as Mr. Jinx?
Yes.
Because you were seeking my approval?.
Yes.
- Because you love Pam? - Yes.
Do you want to marry her?
I did.
Till I met you.
What does that mean?
I love your daughter. I love her more than anything.
But frankly, sir, I'm terrified of being your son-in-law.
This weekend has made me doubt that I could even survive in your family.
I think you've got some serious issues.
If I lighten up, would you consider marrying my daughter?
Would you lighten up a lot?
- Y... - Yes or no?
- Yes. - Would you let us live our lives?
I promise not to interfere in your lives.
Stop making fun of me for being a nurse?
Could you at least try to consider another profession?
- Jack, yes or no? - Ever?
- No. - OK, yes.
- Let me and Pam sleep together? - Don't push it, Focker.
You're in a real mess.
Would you support my daughter the way she deserves to be?
Yes.
Would you be honest and faithful?.
Yes.
Will you devote yourself entirely to her for the rest of your life?
Of course.
Gaylord Focker...
Will you be my son-in-law?
(Door creaks )
Greg? I thought you were going back to Chicago.
We had a little plane trouble.
Plus, your dad caught up with me at the airport.
Don't...don't worry, it's OK.
We worked out a lot of our issues.
You and my dad worked out a lot of your issues?
He gave me his human lie detector thing, but I passed.
- Good. - Yeah.
And...
then he proposed.
Are you feeling all right?
Listen... This weekend was a nightmare.
Oh.
I had this elaborate plan, but somewhere...
between giving your sister a black eye and...
setting the house on fire, it kind of went off track.
I just... I love you.
I love you so much.
I don't know, it makes no sense...
I think he's about to do it.
Come on, honey. Give 'em some privacy.
Shh-shh!
And if we can get through...what we got through in the last 48 hours,
we could get through anything.
I think so, too.
- And I don't... - Wait, hang on a sec.
(Whispers ) Mr. Jinx.
Mew mew mew mew. Mew mew mew mew.
Hi, Jinx...
It's a ring.
I like to think of it as a little circle of trust.
Pam...
Will you marry me?
Yes!
Attaboy, Greg.
That "circle of trust" thing, that's mine.
Well, looks like we've got another wedding to plan.
Yup. Just got to do one more thing.
- What's that? - Meet his parents.
- Jack... - Honey, relax.
I'm sure they're wonderful, fascinating people.
Good night, Jack.
I mean, they'd have to be, right? To name their son Gaylord Focker?
(Pam sighs )
Do you, Deborah Byrnes, take Robert Banks to be your wedded husband?
Yes! I mean, I do!
I now pronounce you man and wife.
Let's just see if you really can flush the toilet, Jinxy.
I knew it.
(Greg) 'Oh! Shit!'
I knew it.
'Damn!'
That's my future son-in-law. What do you think?
'Hello, Jack.
'Aw, look at that. Nice, Jack. Hi.
'What's that, Jack? What?
'You're a big, fat, CIA man, huh?
'Did they teach you THAT...? They teach you THAT?
'Oh, yeah, what's that, Jack?
'You thought "Puff" was just the name of the boy's magic dragon?
'Not too quick on the uptake, huh?
'Why don't you ask Denny? Not onto that one, huh?
'Surprising for a big CIA pulse detector.
'Ooh, hey, check my pulse on this question.
'Do I think you're a psycho? Yes.
'What? Oh, you like my little...gift?
'What? The Jerusalem what?
'I can't hear you. Jerusalem tulipoosy-posly-lit...?
'What? Oh, you don't know shit about flowers. You want me to what?
'A question? Sure...
'Can you deal with THAT?!'
# When you're a fool in love
# Seems like the skies are always gray
# You turn around, there's someone in your way
# And it's you
# And you're in love
# Never another spring for you
# Never a robin to sing for you
# You're out there on your own
# When you're a fool
# In love
# Quand tu es fou d'amour
# Le ciel parait toujours plus bleu
# Tu te retournes y'a quelqu'un qui te gène
# Mais c'est toi, tu es amoureux
# Jamais un autre printemps pour toi
# Jamais les oiseaux chanteront pour toi
# Tu es tout perdu tout seul
# Quand tu es fou d'amour
# Des fois tu crois voir ta chance tourner
# Devant toi surgit un arc-en-ciel
# Mais quand tu es fou d'amour
# Tu restes fou jusqu'au dernier jour
# Never another spring for you
# Jamais les oiseaux chanteront pour toi
# You're out there on your own
# When you're a fool in love #